Online, I am frequently attributed with various “rules of life” that I did not write. I decided it was high time for me to write my own, so I could have a better point of reference in instances such as this. For my friends. One day, you will come to realize that you are alone. The truth is, you have always been alone, but this fact tends to come too late. Parents pass away, husbands cheat, lovers cheat, children grow up. Or you part ways because they are strangers to you now. What worked yesterday is falling apart. Whatever happens, remember this: loneliness is always behind you, as winter. Maturity is the power to be alone without drama. It is better to prepare ahead of time, and I will tell you how.
1. Everyone except your immediate family is replaceable. Nothing and no one is the same. Let new people into your life, even if you don’t yet know if you have anything in common. One day you’ll realize you’re alone, and that will save you.
2. Always try new things: food, clothes, routes, gadgets, activities, movies, books, theories, and explanations of the universe. The brain is made of lazy gum. The more time passes, the more it wants to bend in the same places, while the rest of its convolutions try to disappear. Don’t let it hold on to the same things, pleasures, paths, methods, and tricks. Always try new things, especially when you’re lazy, scared, or don’t feel like it. One day, you’ll find yourself alone, and that will save you.
3. Forgive everyone you can, forget the rest. Oblivion is the best punishment and the best medicine. And never argue with anyone; get a manicure instead.
4. There’s no rush. Everything that happens quickly is short-lived. If you really want something, do it. If you don’t want it anymore, it’s because it wasn’t necessary. Put off risky desires and actions, let them settle. Do something you’re unsure about only if the desire has been haunting you for a long time.
5. This argument adds to the previous one: if you really want something and it is right, then do it. Desires are life. Let the desire live inside you and observe it. If it doesn’t fade away, then follow it.
6. Never give up as long as you want something. Success is experience, that is, the number of repetitions. Any failure is a lack of experience and is compensated for by experience. Courage and risk are experiences. What sometimes looks like pure impudence is experience. Perseverance, tolerance, the ability to forgive, resilience, and independence – all this is experience. The most important thing is not to give up as long as you want something.
7. Nothing is the end, not even the end: everything is just a flow. Remember this in despair, in grief, at the grave of a friend, reading a letter from a loved one who has left you. The day will surely come when you say: “And for the best!” (This is especially true for a loved one :). Nothing is the end: one day you will realize that you are left alone, and this thought will save you.
8. Nothing is the end, but the end is near. And it is more useful to think that it is tomorrow. Then it is easier to follow all these points.
9. Do whatever you want, but take care of your body; it will unexpectedly take revenge on you. Develop the habit of asking what it wants and doing it. If you’ve never listened to your body and don’t know how it speaks, start with simple things like forest walks, swimming, or yoga. Then everything will happen on its own: the body is waiting to be heard.
10. Romance, love, and passion are wonderful. But if you confuse them with sex, you can be without it for a long time. And that’s stupid and harmful. Make sure you have sex. Let romance and love, when they come, find you in bed with a new lover.
11. The last thing you have to worry about is what others think of you. Others think mostly of themselves, and also of you, comparing themselves to themselves. That is, they don’t think of you or of each other. Do what you want and see point 7.
12. Fear certainty. Certainty is the beginning of insanity. Doubt, consider other possibilities, keep escape routes open for yourself and others. I doubt every point I wrote. But for now, I think I’ll leave everything alone. One day, I’ll be alone, and I’ll see if all this will save me.
P.S. This is the only point I have no doubts about: take care of your friends. Friends are the only thing worth accumulating (I’ve been successful so far). One day, I’ll realize I’m alone, and my friends will immediately appear and say, “You’re completely nuts, you still have us.” And it’s true :
